Good Woman

A few days ago a friend of mine introduced me to Cat Power. I know, I’m very late. Of course I knew who Cat Power was thanks to Juno (Sea of Love) but I didn’t know. My friend made me a playlist “Cat Power for Sara” and I have been listening to it on repeat for the last three days. Clinging to it. Clinging to the words. One song in particular, “Good Woman.”

Maybe it’s because I grew up in the church, the Bible wringing in my ears, but I have always wrestled with categorizing people as good or bad. Especially people I am close to. Intimate with. Are they good or bad? I need to know. And it usually changes from one to the other as I tread the line from trusting to isolating. I suppose it’s just a way of protecting myself. From pain and from the mystery of complicated people. Because we are all good and bad. Aren’t we? We contain both light and dark. That’s what makes us people. Not angels or demons.

Cat Power’s song goes -

“I want to be a good woman And I want for you to be a good man This is why I will be leaving And this is why I can't see you no more I will miss your heart so tender And I will love this love forever”

If I could write to him now this is what I would say. I would say that I loved all of him - even the parts I could no longer live with.